Why I don't Teach Kindergarten

I LOVE Kindergartners! They are so tiny, and cute, and (usually) so innocent. Sometimes I think it would be so fun to teach Kindergarten just to spend time with the adorable little kids. Then I have experiences that remind me why I can't do it. Its one of the most dreaded days of the year. Bus evacuation drill day. In the morning all the teachers walk around and give each other sympathetic looks that say "Yes, its bus evacuation day". The bus evacuation drill only takes about 20 minutes. That's not the bad part. Its everything leading up to it and afterwards. The entire day is filled to the brim with questions like this, "What if the bus has a fire in the front and in the back and in the middle and its upside down and in water and the bus driver can't talk and the windows won't open and we can't open the back door...what do we do then?" On and on the questions go. Knowing this, I prepped my class carefully. "The bus driver will ask if you have questions," I warn " and 3 kids can ask her a question and then we're done! If you have more questions talk about them with your parents at home." I love third grade. They heard me, they understood, I was home free. We had to share the bus so they could get through more classes at once. We were sharing with the cute, tiny, precious Kindergarten class. My "big kids" sat in the back and I watched as the wide eyed Kindergartners sat on the bus in front of us. I started to feel uneasy when the Kindergartners answered every thing the bus driver said literally. Bus driver: "How are we today?" My class: smiles. Kindergartners: "GOOD! Last night was my dad's birthday and we had a cake and I gave him a present and he liked it and we played a game..."etc. This continued until the dreaded part, "questions?" It was not so dreaded because I knew I had prepared my class. However, 25 Kindergarten hands flew up in the air. "Oh no," I thought. "Here comes the disaster questions." The driver called on a little girl sitting in front of me, "Yes, what's your bus question" she said. The girl said without hesitation, "I really love school and I'm glad I made new friends." The driver and I exchanged puzzled looks. "Ok," she said. "Anyone else have questions about what to do in a bus emergency? " Another Kindergarten hand. "I love dogs," said a little boy. Then and there I decided, I can't teach Kindergarten.